The trend is recent and something that picks up from the frantic pace of urban living. Often hectic schedules and lack of socializing leaves one feeling adrift and sidelined. Thus people draw support in whichever form they can or so observes, psychologist Surendra Mehta, Care clinic, "Casual sex is on the rise because of factors like loneliness, peer pressure, living away from one's home. It happens when there's no faith left in oneself. Think of someone who doesn't have a great job or a fulfilling relationship or lacks friends to bail him/her out in times of crisis. It is then that they fall on measures that they assume can lift their spirits for some time. Sex is more like an addiction just as people tend to eat a lot when depressed."
Hollywood too swears by the benefits of casual sexual encounters. Leading actress Cameron Diaz for instance recently stated that there isn't a better way to get back in shape than hitting the sack. Studies too have revealed that women are less likely to regret an impromptu fling, if they feel gratified sexually afterwards. Most women don't equate a romp in the sack with a walk down the aisle. Surveys reveal that over 52 per cent believe their most recent casual encounter to be 'just a one-time thing'.
Actress Sherlyn Chopra confessed her need for casual sex as a boost to her self worth. The starlet was quoted as saying she doesn't mind a one-night-stand and if the sex is great, she would feel good about herself.
Doctors claim that a session in bed with an unknown face can actually spice up your personal life.
Although none would advise it, but the fact remains that it jolts you back out of your boredom and pushes you to being innovative. Says a doctor on condition of anonymity, "I have had patients who find no interest in having sex with their husbands/wives. In fact, they complain of being turned off by the very thought of it. However, a torrid fling outside marriage breathes new life into a sagging relationship with one's spouse. Does it really matter if you get back your stamina and feel good about yourself, even if your spouse was unaware of what went on behind his back?"
Manish Singh, a software professional, points out, "I think the key is that everyone wants to
matter, especially to their sex partners. We have created a world in which we treat sex as a
private recreational activity, with no moral or social significance. But when sex is a recreational
activity, my partner becomes equivalent to a consumer good. And we all know what we do with
consumer goods that cease to satisfy us beyond a point, we get rid of them. In this world of
consumer sex, it is socially acceptable to find pleasure with people you don't love. But yes, no
one likes to end up feeling used."
A recent study done by the University of Chicago on the sexual lives of adults reveals that
housewives bored by their routine look for affairs outside their marriage. In fact, a one-night-stand often reignites the lost spark that may have gotten snuffed out due to marriage and monotony, a la Tabu who played the rebellious wife in the Mahesh Manjrekar's film Astitva.
According to psychologist Suparna Puri, women often get attached while having sex. The hormone Oxytocin or the attachment hormone makes them feel closer to their partner. So she advises, "Be clear about who you want to indulge yourself with". Puri believes it's alright to be daring and adventurous, but warns that the high doesn't last for long. Soon there is a sense of wanting to pull out and starting again.
The balance though is heavily tilted towards women. And though the freedom of body is a heady
feeling, yet there are certain precautions to be kept in mind:
1. Get yourself checked for AIDS and STD frequently if you are indulging in casual sex.
2. Always, always use a condom or other precautions while having sex.
3. Having a one-night-stand is okay as long as you are consciously aware of what you are doing. You don't want to fall into the wrong hands and get beaten up.
4. Steer clear of strangers who you think come across as "weird". It is better to follow your gut than being sorry later.
5. If you are someone who gets carried away emotionally, then such affairs are definitely not for you.
6. Men take heed and check the background of the person you are going out with. You could easily be led to drugs if you don't watch out.
7. If you feel any kind of discomfort physically after an intercourse, see a doctor immediately.
8. Visit a psychiatrist if you think you are going through an emotional vacuum and need help.
9. Speak to friends, family and close ones if you think your loneliness is the reason for you to
hunt partners.
10. Believe in love and care because nothing works better than these.
It's all about a Healthy Relationship:-In this entire cry about women and sex, it seems men are completely pushed away from the limelight. Could the reason be that sex gets easily associated with men and thus requires not much thought? Says Atul Suri,a consultant with an MNC, "A general conception is that men are more interested in sex. However, I think nowadays women are also free spirited while men are becoming conservative. I can indulge in sexual activities with anyone, but I don't want to. My friends of course do, but I think their outlook is changing as well. Today a guy wants to be just a one-woman-man, both physically and mentally."
Explains Puri, "For men it is no longer about sex and affairs. Men today concentrate on developing healthy relationships with the opposite sex. That could also arise from the fact that they are aware that the society is open to men having casual sex, so it isn't a big deal. However for women to do the same there is the pleasure of breaking barriers and also a sense of power. So it's more of women wanting to try out new things and explore areas so far a taboo to them."
Source : Times of India
Kelly Katrina Hildebrandt and Kelly Carl Hildebrandt
According to the Associated Press, it all started when the 20-year-old Kelly Katrina Hildebrandt was up one night, curious to see if anyone shared her name.
